May 4, 2013

So grateful for May 4th... 4 years later

Four years ago today Alisha and I, dating at the time, were hit head on by a girl driving a Honda Civic 40 miles an hour on Freedom Blvd in Provo Utah. We were on a scooter at the time, and because we were only about two miles from my apartment renting a movie we weren't too worried about wearing helmets. We were traveling about 35 miles an hour going straight with the right-of-way when out of nowhere a young girl going way to fast turned left improperly and nailed us head on.

Alisha broke her neck (C1,C2) and back in seven places, her femur, knee, and her foot. She was also partially scalped as well (she is very fortunate to still have hair). She was awake and alert through the the whole experience and has scary flashbacks every time she is traveling straight and she has to pass someone turning left.

I broke my leg just above my ankle, tore three of the tendons in neck, and broke my skull in three places. My frontal lobe was hit so hard it began to bleed and swell. I was comatose instantly and remained in a coma for 3 days.

Spencer Ryan Hall who was traveling behind us responded heroically to the accident. After alerting oncoming traffic to be careful, he grabbed a shirt and after "trying" to put Alisha's scalp together held it tightly on her head which slowed down the bleeding. We know by the Grace of our Heavenly Father Ryan was guided to be there to take care of us at that moment!

The responders immediately placed Alisha in an Ambulence and rushed he to the Provo IHC hospital (against her will because she didn't want to leave me). Because I was comatose and not breathing at first the responders thought I was gone and focused on Alisha (it was the right thing to do).

After Alisha was rushed to the hospital the police officers began taking pictures of the scene of the accident because they thought I was dead and began treating it as a crime scene. As they were taking pictures one of them noticed I was breathing and at that point I was rushed to the hospital as well.

At the hospital the doctors frantically began to work on Alisha. She was in extreme shock to the point that she was not recognizing pain, and the doctors were concerned that if she kept moving she might become paralyzed. Her knee and foot were both shattered and her foot was so bad that the first night they felt they would have to amputate her leg from the knee down. Alisha was not about to let that happen and told the doctors that they were not allowed to amputate and to get to work putting it together the best they could. (Sometimes... Stubbornness is ok:). The doctored saved her foot and knee and the only thing missing is the little piggy that went to the market... We believe that he got lost and are still hopeful one day he will find his way home. ;). She had to wear a halo for for 4 months and was in a wheel chair for quite awhile as well. Amazingly once out of the hospital 5 weeks later, she was determined to go to work and did everyday for a couple of months in this condition. She also met an NBA basketball player, Thurl Bailey, at church and couldn't see above his waist because of the halo and his height. She thought he was a giant:).

While I was in a coma the doctors prepared my family for the worst. They did have much hope that I would make it, and IF I did I might not have a brain that worked or might have to relearn everything. My father passed away from Brain cancer 10 months earlier at the age of 52, so you can imagine how my dear mother and my brother and sisters must have felt during the car ride to Provo after receiving a phone call stating they needed to hurry to the hospital because I had been in a tragic accident. When my mom asked how I was the nurse could not tell her and just repeated hurry and get here.

After 3 days in a coma I began to wake up. Because I woke up telling everyone I was wolverine (saw the movie wolverine 2 days before the accident... Awesome) everyone worried if I had my full memory. At first I didn't... I had to attend speech therapy for seven months and fortunately over time and hard work my motor skills and memory began working normally. I had a real struggle reading out loud, it was very difficult and I worried I would never be able to participate in public speaking, which is my passion, ever again. Because reading out loud was my battle I became very determined to never give up and to practice, practice, practice... I woke up every morning for months at 5 am to read out loud for a couple of hours and this was by far the most effective therapy I had.

4 years later Alisha and I are happily and gratefully married and have been blessed to have an amazing little girl Savannah and another little one on the way. I went back to the hospital about 18 months after the accident to thank the doctors and nurses for everything and some of them were emotional when they saw and heard me because they never imagined that I would recover the way that I did.

Alisha and I learned many lessons through this trial for us... We learned Forgiveness in a deep way. Not only did the young girl hit us while turning improperly at high speeds without the right-of-way, but she also did not pay her insurance the month before she hit us so we were left with almost $500,000 dollars of medical debt (I had only been at my job 2 months so hadn't qualified for insurance yet). We also learned about the power of love and selflessness from family's sacrifices to spend time and money to take care of us and stay by outsides daily, and from the doctors and nurses who befriended us, loved us, and helped put smiles on our faces and the faces of our family members during such a crazy time. Tawny Atwood one of our nurses has become an eternal friend (family member) to Alisha and I and she literally was Heavenly Fathers instrument in comforting my Mom and looking out for here.

Most of all... I learned how real and powerful the love God our Father has for us. Alisha and I experienced His love for us daily as we were on the verge of giving up and quitting. I know that God lives... I know that we knew Him before we ever came to this earth, and that although we can't remember anything before we came here, we are eternal beings having a mortal experience and there is a very important reason for this life. I know that we can learn this reason IF we seek after it. Although Alisha and I hope to never experience anything like that again, the pain was unbearable at times, we would never take that experience back for anything because we have had our eyes opened and we are now more willing to see Him and His miracles daily as we seek Him. We live with gratitude now and are so grateful even for things that before the accident we were ashamed of.

We are all so blessed!! There is very important purpose to this life and although it is a beautiful journey I have discovered that there are very important customised lessons for each of us. As we live our lives with purpose and recognized we are not here by some Big Bang chance we will begin to discover Him as we seek just as He wants us to.

Today 4 years after the hardest trials I have ever experienced... Losing my hero and best friend Kim Gregson (Pops), and almost dying with my incredible wife, I am so grateful for this hard but miraculous time in my life. I cannot wait until the day when I can kneel before my Heavenly Father and humbly look Him in the eyes to tell Him how grateful I am that He rescued me and spared me from myself so that I can come home again. Until then I will show Him my love and gratitude for Him daily by the way I choose to live my life, and the service I give to the rest of His children each day.